Friday, March 25, 2011

Greatness of "MOTHER"

MATRUPANCHAKAM (Extolling the Greatness of Mother)..........


Sri Sankara Bhagvatpada(788AD - 820AD) played a major role in the propogation of benign mother worship. The great Acharya Sri Sankara with great difficulty, got the consent of his mother, to adopt Sanyasa Ashrama at a very tender age of eight. The mother seeing the firm resolve of her son and also the plight in which her little son was caught in between the jaws of death in the form of a crocodile, ultimately reconciled herself to the inevitable and gave consent to Sankara to become a yati. But she imposed a condition that Sri Sankara should be at her bed side at the time of her death and that he must cremate her with all rites after death. Sri Sankara also agreed to this and promised his mother to do so.


The five verses which form the Matru Panchakam are found to be in tune with the episode. Sankara with his intuitive powers sensed that the last moment of his mother's life was nearing. Aryambal also thought of her beloved son Sri Sankara. The Acharya was at the time in Sringeri and soon by the dint of his yogic powers hastenedto the side of his dying mother in his ancestral house at kalady. He stood reverentially with folded hands before his mother. He praises his mother ARYAMBAL in these five hymns.


In the first hymn he describes how the mother patiently undergoes the suffering from the time of conception to the moment of delivery. The unbearable pain at the time of giving birth to her son, the physical weakness during pregnancy, the misery she has to put up for one year with wet and dirty bed and agony of bearing the child in the womb for ten long months are highlighted in his salutations to his mother.


1.AASTAAM TAAVADIYAM PRASOOTISAMAYE

DURVAARASHOOLAVYATHA

NAIRUCHYAM TANUSHOSHANAMMALAMAYEE

SHAYYAA CHA SAAMVATSAREY

EKASYAPI NA GARBHAAR BHARAN KLESHASYA YASYA(a)KSHAMO DAATUM

NISHKRUTIMUNNATO(a)PI TANAYAHA TASYAI JANANYAI NAMAHA

In the Second hymn he tells the following - once when Sri Sankara was pursuing his studies in the Gurukula, Aryambal had a dream in which she saw her tiny son taking to sanyasa. She was severely shocked about what she saw in her dream. She could not control herself. She ran to the gurukula, the next morning to verify the truth. she became

emotional and wept there loudly. Seeing her in that pitiable plight the entire gurukula also wept alongwith her and shared her grief. This was indeed a premonition to Aryambal about the crocodile incident and sankara getting permission from her to go into the samnyasa ashrama. Sri Sankara recalls this incident at the time of Aryambal's death in this second hymn.


2.GURUKULAMUPSRUTYA SVAPNAKAALE TU DHRUSHTVAA

YATI SAMUCHITH VESHAM PRARUDO MAAM TVAMUCCHAIHI

GURUKULAMATH SARVAM PRARUDHATTHE SAMASKSHAM

SAPADHI CHARANYOSTEY MAATURASTU PRANAMAHA


In the third stanza Sri Sankara laments that he could not perform any funeral rites because he is an ascetic. Sri Sankara was at the death bed of ARYAMBAL when she was fully conscious. She was indeed delighted to see her son at the right time. However Sankara describes the state of a son, who could not be present at the last moments of one's own mother. He recalls the paramount duty of a son to be present at the time of departure of her soul, offering the Ganges water in her mouth and uttering the KARNA JAPA namely the chanting of Taraka Rama nama into her right ear, by keeping the mother's head on his lap and finally offering oblations to the departed soul, chanting vedic mantras.


3. NA DATTAM MAATASTAE MARANASAMAYAE TOYAMAPI VAA

SVADHAA VAA NO DAEYAA MARANDIVASAE SHRAADDHAVIDHINAA

NA JAPTO MAATASTAE MARANASAMAYAE TAARAKAMANUHU

AKAALAE SAMPRAAPTE MAYI KURU DAYAAM MAATARATULAAM


In fourth stanza - To an affectionate mother who has given everything to her son with loving words, sankara laments that he has been placed in a pitiable position to offer nothing but mere dry raw rice in her mouth. Here Sankara anguishes with emotion and is not able to control himself. This fourth stanza is so moving that it reflects the intense feelings of a duty bound son.


4. MUKTAMANISTVAM NAYANAM MAMAETI

RAAJAETI JEEVAETI CHIRAM SUTA TVAM

ITYUKTAVATYAASTAVA VAACHI MAATAHA

DADAAMYAHAM TANDULAMAESHA SHUSHKAM


The fifth is the concluding stanza of this PANCHAKAM as implied by its name. Sankara once again remember the unbearable hardship his mother had suffered at the time of confinement for courage and support to withstand the pains. The great Acharya offers his gratitude to his loving mother, in this hymn.


5.AMBAETI TAATAETI SHIVAETI TASMIN

PRASOOTIKAALAE YADAVOCHA UCHCHAIHI

KRUSHNAETI GOVINDA HARAE MUKUNDAETYAHO

JANANYAI RACHITO(a)YAMANJALIHI


To conclude is the below :::


yatraiva yatraiva mano madeeyam

tatraiva tatraiva tava svaroopam

yatraiva yatraiva shiro madeeyam

tatraiva tatraiva padadvayam tae.


(Mother! Wherever my restless mind travels

There may be your form appear;

And Wherever my head bows

May Your Lotus Feet be seen)


YAA DEVI SARVA BHUTESHU MAATRUROOPENA SAMSTITHA NAMASTASYAI NAMASTASYAI NAMASTASYAI NAMO NAMAHA.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Reach............................

Reach..........................

The path between wanting and having is doing. To stop just
Wanting, and begin having, then start doing.

The greatest, most well-conceived plans are worthless if
They're not acted upon. If it's going to happen, someone
Must make it happen.

All sorts of outstanding opportunities are open to the
Person who is willing to take action. Be that person, take
That action, with commitment and persistence, and reap the
Valuable rewards of fulfilling those opportunities.

You don't have to be a world-renowned genius to be smart
Enough to take action. You don't need anyone's permission to
Act on your dream.

You must simply do it. Figure out what has to happen and
Take complete responsibility for making it happen.

Anything you truly desire is within your reach. Simply
Stand up, lift up your commitment, lift up your spirit, lift
Up your arms and do precisely that................. REACH.

Goodn reasons to stay in Bed.......................is good.

Good reasons to stay in bed...............is good.


Sometimes your health demands it................

You might think it's your worst habit: groaning at the sound of your alarm clock, slamming the snooze button and sleeping in until you're running very, very late.But if you're tired enough to want to stay in bed all morning, your body might well be telling you to stay in bed – at least for a little while.

The snooze button can be an important part of healthy sleep management.
Without proper sleep, you're more at risk of developing chronic health conditions like diabetes and heart disease.

Waking up tired is more likely to make you irritable, forgetful,depressed,
accident-prone and, of course, sleepy. And even just one hour of sleep less than the recommended eight per night increases your chances of coming down with a cold.

So if you're free to sleep in, you should.

Here are three times it's all right to catch a few extraz's.

You've been missing precious sleep....................

When you don't get enough sleep too many nights in a row, you become increasingly tired.

Don't let your sleep debt get out of hand – alleviate it in small intervals by sleeping an extra hour or less every day until you've caught up.

The increments are important, as researchers have found that oversleeping
by more than an hour can disrupt your body clock.

You're planning to skimp on sleep..........

If you know you'll be low on sleep during a busy period, pay it forward.
A study has found that people who stocked up on sleep prior to a sleepless week were more alert than their more tired peers. Remember, the same rules apply here as in the post-deficit naps – don't add more than an hour of extra sleep onto your wake-up time each day.

You're sleeping less so you can exercise..............

Exercising in the morning is a sensible habit – as long as you don't go overboard. The days when you wake up dragging your feet and dreading the thought of going to the gym are usually days when you're tired or low on sleep, or days before you get sick, are actually the days you might want to skip your fitness routine.

Give yourself that extra hour in lieu of exercise so that you can get back on track with your rest. This will also ensure you won't have to skip more gym days later.

Finally, whatever your sleep habits or strategy, make sure that the hours you sleep are high quality.

Create a perfectly comfortable sleep environment, follow a bedtime routine and have a regular sleep schedule.

If you exercise, do so at least 3 hours before bedtime.
Make sure to get some sunshine during the day. Avoid caffeine in the evening, and remember that a light snack late in the day can help you sleep.

Hi......Enjoy reading this and abide by its principles.

Three Words....................................

Three Words ...........that are most important in a married life.......


Three-Word Phrases, can be tools to help develop every relationship.
There are many things that you can do to strengthen your relationships.
Often the most effective thing you can do involves saying just three words.

When spoken sincerely, these statements often have the power to develop
new friendships, deepen old ones and even bring healing to relationships
that have soured.

The following three-word phrases can be tools to help develop every relationship.

~Let me help:................

Good friends see a need and then try to fill it.When they see a hurt they do what they can to heal it. Without being asked, they jump in and help out.

~I understand you:...................

People become closer and enjoy each other more when the other person
accepts and understands them. Letting your spouse know - in so many little ways - that you understand them, is one of the most powerful tools for healing your relationship. And this can apply to any relationship.

~I respect you:..................

Respect is another way of showing love.Respect demonstrates that
another person is a true equal. If you talk to your children as if they were adults you will strengthen the bonds and become closer friends.
This applies to all interpersonal relationships.

~I miss you:...................

Perhaps more marriages could be saved and strengthened if couples simply
and sincerely said to each other I miss you.This powerful affirmation tells partners they are wanted, needed, desired and loved.Consider how important you would feel, if you received an unexpected phone call
from your spouse in the middle of your workday, just to say “I miss you.”

~Maybe you re right:.................

This phrase is very effective in diffusing an argument. The implication when you say maybe you re right is the humility of admitting, maybe Im wrong. Lets face it. When you have an argument with someone, all you normally do is solidify the other persons point of view. They, or you, will not likely change their position and you run the risk of seriously damaging the relationship between you. Saying maybe you re right can open the door to explore the subject more. You may then have the opportunity to express your view in a way that is understandable to the other person.

~ Please forgive me:..............

Many broken relationships could be restored and healed if people would
admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and failures. A man should never be ashamed to own up that he has been in the wrong, which is saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.
~ I thank you:..................

Gratitude is an exquisite form of courtesy.People who enjoy the companionship of good, close friends are those who dont take daily courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank their friends for their many expressions of kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle of friends is severely constricted often do not have the attitude of gratitude.

Count on me:............

A friend is one who walks in when others walk out. Loyalty is an essential ingredient for true friendship. It is the emotional glue that bonds people. Those that are rich in their relationships tend to be steady and true friends. When troubles come, a good friend is there indicating you can count on me.

I ll be there:............

If you have ever had to call a friend in the middle of the night,
to take a sick child to hospital, or when your car has broken down
some miles from home, you will know how good it feels to hear the phrase
I ll be there.Being there for another person is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly present for other people, important things happen to them and us.We are renewed in love and friendship.
We are restored emotionally and spiritually. Being there is at the very core of civility.

~ Go for it:..............

We are all unique individuals. Dont try to get your friends to conform to your ideals. Support them in pursuing their interests, no matter how far out they seem to you. God has given everyone dreams, dreams that are unique to that person only.Support and encourage your friends to follow their dreams. Tell them to go for it.

~ I love you:............

Perhaps the most important three words that you can say.
Telling someone that you truly love them satisfies a persons deepest emotional needs. The need to belong, to feel appreciated and to be wanted. Your spouse, your children,your friends and you, all need to hear those three little words: I love you.Love is a choice. You can love even when the feeling is gone................................................AND WE LIVE ONLY ONCE AND IF WE LIVE RIGHT ONCE IS ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!

The Empty Soap Box...........................

The Empty Soap Box......................


One of the most memorable case studies on Japanese management was the case of the empty soap box, which happened in one of Japan's biggest cosmetics companies. The company received a complaint that a consumer had bought a soap box that was empty.

Immediately the authorities isolated the problem to the assembly line, which transported all the packaged boxes of soap to the delivery department. For some reason, one soap box went through the assembly line empty.

Management asked its engineers to solve the problem. Post-haste, the engineers worked hard to devise an X-ray machine with high- resolution monitors manned by two people to watch all the soap boxes that passed through the line to make sure they were not empty.

No doubt, they worked hard and they worked fast but they spent whoopee amount to do so. But when a workman was posed with the same problem, did not get into complications of X-rays, etc but instead came out with another solution.

He bought a strong industrial electric fan and pointed it at the assembly line. He switched the fan on, and as each soap box passed the fan, it simply blew the empty boxes out of the line.

Moral of the story: Always look for simple solutions. Devise the simplest possible solution that solves the problem. So, learn to focus on solutions not on problems. "If you look at what you do not have in life, you don't have anything; if you look at what you have in life, you have everything......................AND WHEN YOU HAVE EVERYTHING YOU ARE THE RICHEST PERSON UNDER THE SUN.

Obstacles............................. are meant to overcome.

Obstacles.................are meant to overcome.


"I've always found that anything worth achieving will always
Have obstacles in the way and you've got to have that drive
And determination to overcome those obstacles on route to
Whatever it is that you want to accomplish."

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Self Management....................

Self Management....................


You are responsible for everything that happens in your life. Learn to accept total responsibility for yourself. If you do not manage yourself, then you are letting others have control of your Life. These tips will help "you" manage "you."

Here is a list of things that help you in self management and which will in turn lead you to the path of success: -

Look at every new opportunity as an exciting and new-life experience.

Be a professional who exhibits self-confidence and self-assurance in your potential to complete any task.

Agree with yourself in advance that you will have a good attitude toward the upcoming task.

Frequently ask, "Is what I am doing right now moving me toward my goals?"

Do it right the first time and you will not have to take time later to fix it.

Accept responsibility for your job successes and failures. Do not look for a scapegoat.

Do not view things you do as a "job." View all activities as a challenge.

Use your subconscious mind by telling it to do what you do want. Instead of telling yourself, "I can't do that very well," say, "I can do this very well."-) Give yourself points for completing tasks on your "to-do" list in priority order. When you reach 10 points, reward yourself.

Practice your personal beliefs. It may be helpful each morning to take 15 minutes to gather your thoughts and say a prayer.

Make a commitment to show someone a specific accomplishment on a certain date. The added urgency will help you feel motivated to have it done.

Practice self-determination, wanting to do it for yourself.

Believe that you can be what you want to be.

Never criticize yourself as having a weakness. There is no such thing. You are only talking about a present undeveloped skill or part of yourself that if you so chose, you can change. You do not have any weakness, only untapped potential.

Be pleasant all the time-no matter what the situation.

Challenge yourself to do things differently than you have in the past. It provides new ideas and keeps you interested.

Talk to yourself. A self-talk using positive affirmation is something that is common among all great achievers. They convince themselves that they can accomplish their goals.

Create your own "motivation board" by putting up notes of things you need to do on a bulletin board or special wall space. It is an easily visible way to see what you need to work on. When an item is done, remove the note. Also keep your goals listed and pictured on your board.


Stay interested in what you are doing. Keep looking for what is interesting in your work. Change your perspective and look at it as someone outside your job would,

Establish personal incentives and rewards to help maintain your own high enthusiasm and performance level.


What Employers look for....................is - Self Management

You Are Unique....................

You are Unique............

Don't ever forget that you are Unique.
Be your best self and not an imitation of someone else.
find your strength and use them in a positive way.

Don't listen to those who redicule the choices you make.
Travel the road that you have chosen and don't
look back with regret.

You have to take chances to make your dreams happen.
Remember that there is plenty of time to travel another
road - and still another in your journey through life.

Take the time to take the route that is right for you.
You will learn something valuable every trip you take,
so don't be afraid to make mistakes.

Tell yourself that you're okay as the way you are.
make friends who respect your true self.

Take the time to be alone, too, so you can know
just how terrific your own company be.

Remember that being alone doesn't always mean
being lonely, it can be beautiful experiance of
finding your creativity, your heartfelt feelings,
and the clam and quiet peace deep inside you.

Don't ever forget that you are special and you have
within you the ability to make your dreams come true.

~Jacqueline Schiff~

Mistakes are Lessons

Mistakes are Lessons............

Mistakes are lessons of wisdom.When you make a mistake, don't look back
at it for long.

Take the lesson and move forward.Although the past cannot be changed;
How to shape the future is still in your hands

Challanges........................

Challenges......................


There isn't a single person in the world that hasn't Had to struggle with something or overcome Difficulties at some point in life. We all face
Challenges and adversity.

At this very moment you may be facing one, whether They're related to money, health , children, familyOr careers. It is all part of being alive.

Recognize that obstacles are just part of yourJourney. Don't let them stop you and never give up.Instead, think of them as milestones that once
Passed will bring you closer to your goals.

Remember that with every challenge passed, you are a Little more stronger, a little more wiser and more prepared for The rest of your journey.

Easiest things to Do.............................

The Easiest thing to do.....................


The easiest thing to do when the alarm clock rings would be to roll over and go back to sleep.

Yet if you made that choice every day you would never get anything accomplished.

The easiest thing to do when troubles come your way would be to look for someone else to blame.

Yet even if you find who is to blame, that's not going to remedy the situation.

The easiest thing to do when faced with a challenge would be to run away and hide.

Yet when you do that, the challenge becomes even more difficult the next time.you encounter it, and eventually you'll be unable to avoid it.

Taking the easy way out is never really easy, not in the long run.
Rather than seeking the easiest choice, seek the choice that will fill your life and your world with the most value.

Rather than avoiding effort, welcome that effort and the progress it will bring. Instead of being enticed by the empty promises of an easy answer,
enjoy the rich rewards of holding out for the best answer.
When you have the choice, forget what is easiest and go with what is truly best

Love & Gratitude...............

GRATITUDE IS RARE IN THE WORLD.................

How many times do we regret not expressing love or gratitude? Perhaps, a number of times. This is rather unfortunate but true. Most people are very quick when it comes to criticizing others but keep quiet when a few positive words from them can help people. Death is one reality no one can deny and sooner or later, in a person’s life the day comes when his earthly existence ends. It would be a shame if we die without expressing positive feelings for people who are important to us. Worse is, if the people we love die before us without knowing how much they mattered to us.


Gratitude is the best attitude and it is the memory of the heart. A person is really hurt when a beneficiary says the routine “thanks” that comes without warmth. On the other hand it is very comforting to feel that some people keep fresh always the memory of favours they receive and continue to show their gratitude for long. In life one comes across many thankless persons who are a disgrace to the society. An honest taxi driver who roamed the whole day searching to return a money bag containing currency notes and gold to its owner received not a word of thanks. On the other hand the owner asked him why he not pointed it out to him at the time when he had got down from the taxi.

The best example of gratitude is of a person who goes to blood bank every year to donate his blood because someone had once given him a pint of blood through blood transfusion when he was sick. We may also recall the example of the learned administrator Mr.V.P.Menon, the man behind the integration of the princely states, who took the help of Rs.20/- from an unknown Sikh at Delhi railway station. At that time Mr.Menon was struggling in life.Mr.Menon asked the Sikh to whom he should return the amount, for that the Sikh replied that he could give it to someone in need. A little before his death Mr.Menon asked his daughter to bring the money bag from his room. He then took out two ten rupees notes, gave them to the beggar who was crying at the door.


What if you gave someone a gift, and they neglected to thank you for it-would you be likely to give them another? Life is the same way. In order to attract more of the blessings that life has to offer, you must truly appreciate what you already have. “Thank you” and “please” are the little words with which we make our way smooth in life. We should thank the milkman who brings us milk, the hawker who brings us newspaper, the liftman who carries us up and down, a taxi driver or auto driver who drops us and so on. Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone. Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

Let us express love and gratitude to people who deserve it and tell them how much they mean to us. Let us motivate those who need encouragement. Our feelings in terms of affection add up as blessings for both us and the ones we harbour such feelings for.

Last but not least “As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them”.

The Power of Gratitude.............................................
Gratitude is more than a feeling of thankfulness in response to receiving a tangible gift

Beautiful Thoughts......................

Beautiful Thoughts...

Heavy rains remind us of challenges in life. Never ask for a lighter rain. Just pray for a better umbrella. That is attitude.


When flood comes, fish eat ants & when flood recedes, ants eat fish. Only time matters. Just hold on, God gives opportunity to everyone!

Life is not about finding the right person, but creating the right relationship, it's not how we care in the beginning, but how much we care till ending.

Some people always throw stones in your path. It depends on you what you make with them. Wall or Bridge? Remember you are the architect of your life.

Every problem has (n+1) solutions, where n is the number of solutions that you have tried and 1 is that you have not tried. That’s life.

`Search a beautiful heart, but don't search a beautiful face'. Coz beautiful things are not always good, but good things are always beautiful.

It’s not important to hold all the good cards in life. But it`s important how well you play with the cards which you hold.


Often when we lose all hope & think this is the end, God smiles from above and says, `relax dear its just a bend. Not the end. Have Faith and have a successful life.

When you feel sad, to cheer up just go to the mirror and say, `Damn I am really so cute` and you will overcome your sadness. But don’t make this a habit coz liars go to hell.

One of the basic differences between God and human is, God gives, gives and forgives. But human gets, gets, gets and forgets. Be thankful in life.

Power of LOVE..............................

Power of Love....................

You can transform your world in an instant by the way you Choose to see it. You can change problems into Opportunities, anxiety into enthusiasm, and despair into Determination.

The quality of what you see depends on the perspective from
Which you see it. And that perspective is entirely up to
You.

Instead of reacting again and again to the chaotic ups and
Downs of circumstance, you have a more powerful choice. You
Can choose to live from a constant and unassailable
Perspective of love.

Instead of fighting against most of what happens, you can
Choose to be lifted higher by all that happens. From a
Perspective of love you'll see the positive possibilities in
Every situation.

The way to live from love is to be completely and wholly
Honest with yourself. In the pure truth of who you are and
What you sincerely value, is the limitless power of that
Love.

Allow you to be truly you. And let the power of love color
Your world.

Ten Gems.................................

Ten Gems of sentences................to read and bear in mind always.


1] Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble,
but it is a "steering wheel" that directs the right path throughout

2] Do you know why a Car's WINDSHIELD is so large & the Rear view Mirror is so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. Look Ahead and Move on.

3] Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write.

4] All things in life are temporary. If going well, enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going wrong, don't worry, they can't last long either.

5] Old Friends are Gold! New Friends are Diamond! If you get a Diamond,
don't forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a Base of Gold!

6] Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, "Relax, sweetheart, it's just a bend, not the end!

7] When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities;
when GOD doesn't solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities.

8] A blind person asked Swami Vivekanand: "Can there be anything worse than losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision!"

9] When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them, and
sometimes,when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed for you.

10] WORRYING does not take away tomorrows' TROUBLES, it takes away today's'PEACE

Murphy's Law.............................

MURPHY'S LAWS...............................

Nothing is as easy as it looks.

Everything takes longer than you think.

Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong. Corollary: If there is a worse time for something to go wrong, it will happen then.

If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.

If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a procedure can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop.

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.

It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.

Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.

Every solution breeds new problems.

Murphy's Military Laws..........................

Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are.

No battle plan ever survives contact with the enemy.

Friendly fire ain't.

The most dangerous thing in the combat zone is an officer with a map.

The problem with taking the easy way out is that the enemy has already mined it.

The buddy system is essential to your survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.

The further you are in advance of your own positions, the more likely your artillery will shoot short.

Incoming fire has the right of way.

If your advance is going well, you are walking into an ambush.

The quartermaster has only two sizes, too large and too small.

If you really need an officer in a hurry, take a nap.

The only time suppressive fire works is when it is used on abandoned positions.

The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.

There is nothing more satisfying that having someone take a shot at you, and miss.

Don't be conspicuous. In the combat zone, it draws fire. Out of the combat zone, it draws sergeants.

If your sergeant can see you, so can the enemy.

Murphy's Technology Laws........................................

You can never tell which way the train went by looking at the track.

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition.

Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.

The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.

The attention span of a computer is only as long as it electrical cord.

An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.

Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch to be sure.

All great discoveries are made by mistake.

Always draw your curves, then plot your reading.

Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.

All's well that ends.

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.

The first myth of management is that it exists.

A failure will not appear till a unit has passed final inspection.

New systems generate new problems.

To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.

We don't know one millionth of one percent about anything.

Any given program, when running, is obsolete.

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years make.

The faster a computer is, the faster it will reach a crashed state.
Nothing motivates a man more than to see his boss putting in an honest day's work.

Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book.

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most.

After all is said and done, a hell of a lot more is said than done.

Any circuit design must contain at least one part which is obsolete, two parts which are unobtainable and three parts which are still under development.

A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works.

If mathematically you end up with the incorrect answer, try multiplying by the page number.

Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.

Give all orders verbally. Never write anything down that might go into a "Pearl Harbor File."

Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

If you can't understand it, it is intuitively obvious.

The more cordial the buyer's secretary, the greater the odds that the competition already has the order.

In designing any type of construction, no overall dimension can be totalled correctly after 4:30 p.m. on Friday. The correct total will become self-evident at 8:15 a.m. on Monday.

Fill what's empty. Empty what's full. And scratch where it itches.

All things are possible except skiing through a revolving door.

The only perfect science is hind-sight.

Work smarder and not harder and be careful of yor speling.

If it's not in the computer, it doesn't exist.

If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.

When all else fails, read the instructions.

If there is a possibility of several things going wrong the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.

Everything that goes up must come down.

Any instrument when dropped will roll into the least accessible corner.

Any simple theory will be worded in the most complicated way.

Build a system that even a fool can use and only a fool will want to use it.

The degree of technical competence is inversely proportional to the level of management.

Any attempt to print Murphy's laws will jam the printer.

Murphy's Love Laws...........................

All the good ones are taken.

If the person isn't taken, there's a reason. (corr. to 1)

The nicer someone is, the farther away (s)he is from you.

Brains x Beauty x Availability = Constant.

The amount of love someone feels for you is inversely proportional to how much you love them.

Money can't buy love, but it sure gets you a great bargaining position.

The best things in the world are free --- and worth every penny of it.

Every kind action has a not-so-kind reaction.

Nice guys(girls) finish last.

If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

Availability is a function of time. The minute you get interested is the minute they find someone else.

Murphy's Laws of sex....................

The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings.

Nothing improves with age.

No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because it'll never be quite the same again.

Sex has no calories.

Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble.

There is no remedy for sex but more sex.

Sex appeal is 50% what you've got and 50% what people think you've got.

No sex with anyone in the same office.

Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last.

A man in the house is worth two in the street.

If you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.

Virginity can be cured.

When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him.

Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.

The qualities that most attract a woman to a man are usually the same ones she can't stand years later.

Sex is dirty only if it's done right.

It is always the wrong time of month.

The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

When the lights are out, all women are beautiful.

Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either.

Sow your wild oats on Saturday night -- Then on Sunday pray for crop failure.

The younger the better.

The game of love is never called off on account of darkness.

It was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that caused the trouble in the garden.

Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly.

Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs.

There may be some things better than sex, and some things worse than sex. But there is nothing exactly like it.

Love your neighbor, but don't get caught.

Love is a hole in the heart.

If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had gone into our space program, we would now be running hot-dog stands on the moon.

Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics.

Do it only with the best.

Sex is a three-letter word which needs some old-fashioned four-letter words to convey its full meaning.

One good turn gets most of the blankets.

You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

Thou shalt not commit adultery.....unless in the mood.

Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you.

Abstain from wine, women, and song; mostly song.

Never argue with a women when she's tired -- or rested.

A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he couldn't.

What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick.

It is better to be looked over than overlooked.

Never say no.

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he doesn't love her.

Folks playing leapfrog must complete all jumps.

Beauty is skin deep; ugly goes right to the bone.

Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog.

A man is only a man, but a good bicycle is a ride.

Love comes in spurts.

The world does not revolve on an axis.

Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation; the other eight are unimportant.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

Don't do it if you can't keep it up.

There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.

Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight.

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.